The Onion: College Senior Hopes to Turn Love of Data Entry Into Career

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This one hit close to home. Well, okay—it totally nailed the dining room, actually. And given the recent news from the housing market, I’m awfully glad that I’m no longer employed as a spreadsheet and database guru for one of the world’s largest subprime lenders.

As early as age 8, Milch displayed an avid interest in quantitative measurement and numeric arrays. A star pupil in her high school business and typing courses, Milch said that a summer principles of information technology class at a nearby DeVry University first sparked her desire for a brilliant career in data entry.

“I know I might be listening to my heart more than my brain here, but something inside me keeps telling me to go for it,” Milch said. “I’ve never wanted to do anything else. I’ll take low pay, I’ll work under fluorescent light, I’ll telecommute if I have to—just let me do what I’m meant to do.”

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While these idealists continue to send out resumés and cold call dozens of potential employers, their futures remain uncertain, leaving each of them with the same question: Will the world find a place for my inner callings, or will it crush my deepest dreams?

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